Resurfacing
by Exile From Hysteria
Jillian waits to go under.
Exile from Hysteria is complete.
Yesterday, sometime between noon and three, a surgeon removed my uterus and cervix along with my right ovary and fallopian tube. I’m not gonna lie. The pain is intense.
Sadly I seem to be allergic to the best painkillers. I lived with the first one for almost 18 hours before the itching became too much. Then I switched to a different drug, but too closely on the tail of the first pain killer. Those next six hours are a blur. I came out of it with a swollen allergy lip and demanding that Matt bring with him a back scratcher.
I’m not allowed anti-inflammatories, so I’m relying on ice packs and a stomach binder to keep the swelling down. This part is simply miserable.
Matt has been a trouper. He stayed at the hospital waiting room, hopefully watching an electronic board post my latest status update as I moved through the various stages of surgery. The front desk gave him a restaurant-style beeper to carry that would alert him when I cleared significant hurdles, and more importantly when I was ready to go up to my hospital room.
I don’t remember much about yesterday, but I do remember Matt was there for all of it. He called my mom and brother when I came out of surgery, he met with the surgeon to get the skinny on what went down, he escorted me up to my hospital suite and fed me small pieces of a pork chop dinner.
I sense that resurfacing will take a long time.
My surgeon stopped by this morning, and spoke with me in detail about the surgery. She confirmed a long-standing suspicion that I had about endometriosis moving high in my abdomen. In recent weeks I had another doctor tell me I most likely have gall bladder issues causing the pain below my ribs. It ends up that it was endo the whole time. The surgeon was able to break it down, hopefully eliminating that problem.
Later today I was overcome with unfocused crying jags. I had read about this possibility in the discussion forums, but when the first wave came I was completely unprepared. “Are you in pain?” the nurse asked. “No. I don’t know why I am crying.”
The second jag was inspired simply by the fact that my room is in the Obstetrics wing, and that I can hear the shrill cry of newborns.
Sigh.
I fear this resurfacing will take place in phases. The road I took here was winding. How could I expect the road out would be any different?
Hi Sweetheart!!
Ok, I want you moved out of that wing NOW. I’m sorry, but that is incredibly utterly horribly cruel for you to recover there. If I were there, I’d be putting camo on your bed and sneaking you outta there!!
Dang, you had pork chops already???? I was stuck on liquids and mush for a couple of days!! Good for you!!
Beware of the crying for the next week or so till the hormone replacement kicks in…..oh, I didn’t ask, did they have to remove both the ovaries? Mine were both beyond help, strangled and mutilated by the endo, and it took about a week for the estrogen to kick in fully.
I was so excited to see your post!!! I’m allergic to most pain meds and the only one I can take is dilaudid. That was a trip in more than one way!! Get some rest darlin and we’ll catch you soon!! Love you and Matthew!!!
Char, I love you so much. Only one ovary was removed. For now, the left one is healthy. Thanks for your support, baby!
p.s. You even take a great post-surgery pic!!!
AHHHHH…. and yet she writes. Bravo Jillian. You are a trooper. Made me cry, too.
Thank you, Patty. Big hugs.
Wow! You look terrific! Very gentle and tender hugs. Yay for Matt! (Hugs to him, too.) It WILL get better, and the pain will eventually go away completely.
Something you can look forward to in a bit: instead of spending $ on “feminine products” and the auxiliaries, you’ll be able to put it toward fun stuff. Like hobby/craft supplies, books, movie tix, etc. Maybe start a “fun bank” when you get home?
More gentle hugs. And lotsa good juju.
-Karen
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Thanks Karen. I’ll take all the gentle hugs I can get!
I only recently learned you had a blog — rock on, fellow blogger! But I came here to leave well wishes and virtual hugs. Regards and loving, healing vibes being sent from Dallas!! xoxo
Awwe thanks Farah. It means so much to have your support. Hugs!:)
I am glad that you made it out well. The road in was filled with switch backs and the road out will be too. I am glad that you see that. Once a person realizes that there is no straight road in life, life becomes much easier. I love you very much.
I love you Nick.
Get well soon! It’s over at last, just recover and relax. It’s a bummer about the pain killers! You are braver than me! Every day in every way you are getting better. That’s a mantra my grandma suggested to me and it works.
Thanks so much. I am feeling better today, and may evengo home. Doing my best to think positively!
Hang in there Endosister
i had a hysterectomy in October 2011 and both ovaries needed to go. I also needed bladder surgery at the same time. Recovery was slow. Really slow. So give yourself time to recover and expect to be exhausted for many months after. Your body has been thru a lot! I know a few people who bounced back quickly too. I
Hopefully that will be your experience.
Thanks for the reminder to treat myself gently. I am taking very slow. I really worried about this because I tend to be a sister’s-doin-it-for-herself kinda gal. This has been a great lesson in letting go.
YOU CAN DO THIS! Yes, it is hard… Yes, the road is winding… Yes, you barely know me other than through your blog…
But for some reason you give me strength and hope and I get the sense that you have this beat!!! I promise it will be worth it, crying jags and all.
What a great note! Thank you. It feels to good to know I have sisters supporting me who already have walked this road. I already can sense a change. I really think this is a good result!! Hugs…
I hope you’re recovery is as quick as possible. You are really strong, make sure you take it easy and recover well. You have been through a lot and I admire you for coping well. I hope my kind words help hun xxx
Awwe Sammy. Thanks so much. Having friends like you does make a difference. I’m grateful for your support, darlin.
oh, my love. i remember well the crying for no reason i could discern. you are on your way. it only looks up from here, and this is a promise i can truly make because i am there. much love and much strength to you. i know you can make it through this, because you have waded through much more pain with grace already. xxx
Thank you. Your courage before me, and support throughout has meant the world. Gosh I wish you lived closer. *Hug*
Reblogged this on ourlastembryo's Blog.
All I can do is send you hugs and wish you the speediest of recoveries.
Oh thanks so much.
I’m normally quite an independent lady so this has been quite a lesson in patience. Each day does get better and I see victory in the small stuff. Thanks for cheering me on!!!
On gosh this silly reader didn’t let me know you posted anything, so glad I visited your blog today I had been worried about your surgery, glad it went well, now I’m off to catch up on your posts.
Thanks for checking in. I’m happy to report
I’m doing very well.
Glad you’re doing well. After my third laparoscopy, I developed an infection and my overnight stay turned into a five-day ordeal … housed in maternity, where I’d pass women as big as I was, giving “knowing nods” as they walked through surges and I was trying to waddle off the gas, and every night around 2 or 3 a.m. some hysterical charge nurse would barge in demanding to know where my baby/husband/baby’s birth certificate was. And the woman taking my blood every day always congratulated me on my baby. I mean really, WTF, read a chart once in a while. Insults, meet injury.
Hope you are moving around a lot (don’t let your organs re-stick!) and also taking it easy. No bending, lifting, not even clothes off the floor, for many weeks. Enjoy that.
x
Thanks so much for your note, darlin. What an experience you had. I think I would have just cried and cried if that happened to me. It’s just so difficult placing us ladies with hysterectomies in the same ward as new mothers. Sigh. I’m so glad I got out of there when I did.
Recovery is going well. So grateful I have permission to move. Feels so good. Hugs!!!
Just take it easy! There’s no such thing as going too slowly when it comes to abdominal surgery. I learned the hard way. Be smarter than me
How’s it going with your sign-up sheet? Folks helping out?
The sign up sheet worked out wonderfully. I just posted a blog about how it really helped me get over my fear of asking for help. Haha. And we got a variety of yummy food, too!